baby lotus


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Try not to compare.

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My little daughter Olivia is growing up so fast. She will be 1 in two months, and I feel like it was yesterday I brought her home from the hospital in her little tiny onsie. She is my little bubble of energy that keeps me on my toes.

Before she was born I thought I had this mummy job thing worked out. My son Jensen, was a little text book baby, who honestly was the easiest going little boy. Play, sleep and eat. He was good at all of them. I was confident, and excited about baby number 2.

Then Olivia came along, and shook me to my core. She wasn’t doing the things I was expecting her to do, and was nothing like Jensen was. She wouldn’t sleep at night, and if I wasn’t holding her or near her, she would cry for me. She was so tiny, and so damn cute and so exhausting. And unlike your first child, I didn’t have the luxury of devoting all my time and energies on her. It was shared between two babies.

Please don’t think this is a post about all the negatives. Quite the opposite. I am writing this to let people know what I have learnt with my second. What Olivia has shown and taught me about my abilities, and strengths and the love a mother has for her children.

Olivia is 10 months now, still wakes at night, and still loves me holding her all the time, but that is what I am here for. It is tough at times, and I wake up some morning looking like something out of a horror movie, but that is the beautiful thing about your children. They can drive you mental one minute, and make you laugh the next. Olivia can literally drive me to exhaustion, but then come the morning I will walk into her room and the way her face lights up and smiles when she sees me is priceless. Those moments make it all worth it, and so grateful that I am her mummy.

It is so easy to compare your children, and assume you know what is in store. But if I could make one suggestion, it would be to keep an open mind, and remember that each child is different in their own special ways. Whether you have one or ten children, each one comes with their challenges and blessings.

I am still learning how to be a mother to two children. It isn’t something that comes naturally at first. It takes trial and error, and lots of tears and tantrum from us all. I think you never master it, because your children are ever changing and growing, and reaching new milestones. You just have to learn to be flexible and roll with it. Don’t get comfortable, because before you know it, they will change that script on you.


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Pregnant and Breastfeeding

So I have had a lot of people ask if I am still breastfeeding now that I am pregnant. The answer is yes, I am still breastfeeding my 10 month old son. I would love to continue to feed him till he is 12 months.

My son is down to 2 feeds a day- morning and evening. He eats so much food these days, I have noticed a significant drop in his demand and my supply. So I am sure in the coming weeks he will be more than ready to be completely weaned.

I have to say there has been no real difference with breastfeeding while pregnant. There are all sorts of opinions, and theories on the subject. But I feel, if you can handle it, then do it. It should be a personal choice. I am in the first trimester of pregnancy, so of course feel exhausted, but to be honest I have been so used to waking up for night feeds for so long that I am used to this feeling. Plus my morning sickness is horrendous this time, so the fatigue is really a minor issue for me. My nausea has taken over my life, and I am literally spending my days trying to come up with ideas and ways to help distract me from the feeling.

I feel very lucky to have been able to successfully breastfeed my son this long, and I hope the next baby is the same. I have moments where I imagine a time when my body will be my own again. When I won’t have a child depending on it to grow and be nourished. It will be a long time till then, and I feel lucky that my body is doing what it was designed to do. Not everyone is that lucky, and I always count my blessings.

 

 


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Happy Mother’s Day

10 months ago I gave birth to our son. You came into our lives, and have been nothing but a joy, and blessing to be around. From the minute I found out I was pregnant I did everything I could to make sure you arrived healthy and strong. And in the blink of an eye you were here. I never knew how much love I could have for someone till I met you.

You have taught me to be a better version of myself. Because of you I am always striving to be a better person. There has not a day that has gone by where your father and I don’t pinch ourselves, and just stare at your in amazement. I still can’t believe you really are mine! You are just perfect my son. And I want to thank you. Thankyou for giving me the opportunity to be a mother. To be your mother. I honestly feel like the lucky one.

Today is Mother’s Day. A day to show appreciation to your mother. My mother is truly a special woman. I wouldn’t be the woman I am today without you, and I love you dearly mum!!

As a parent you want nothing but the best for your child. Your father and I often talk about our hopes and dreams for you. Mostly we want you to be healthy, happy, and doing something in life you truly love. I want you to be true to yourself, an honest, loving, caring man. A man who is not afraid to take risks, to love, and to live.

I love you my little baby boy. You make me the proudest mother on earth xxx